Friday, July 11, 2008

Thisisajodielow/The Trouble With Sexting, Cheating and Texting

Originally uploaded by JungsPN

Never let it be said I don't do my research on what brings people to read this blog - far and away, it's people looking for pictures of Aerobics Oz Style glamourpuss Jodie Low - the girl who turned the show from Mumsy fitness with June Jones to glamourous legally available perving in an outdoor setting. Hey, I prefer Leilani Kai, but that's just me. The one thing I would like to say about Ms Low is I may have implied that she was really rubbish at doing leg curls, but she did win the Miss Fitness Award in 1996, so she was clearly at least somewhat competent. It was just de-emphasised on the show and they had her doing the most basic exercises. I wonder if there was a rivalry on the show over got to be the head trainer and who got the Effie Michaels simpleton role.

I don't know what's its like in other countries, but it seems like no good at all can come from owning a mobile phone these days. Every second advert on AUSTAR seems to involve some kind of idiotic and time wasting texting scam, generally involving texting a number to find out if someone is your dream partner. The premise of this seems to be you text your name and someone elses name and they text back a percentage that tells you how likely it is your partner is cheating on you, your partner is the right one for you, or if your partner likes the mince you cooked for them last night. I really have no idea how this can possibly work, but I gave it a shot. i took down the line for "dream partners", and then I texted my name and "Leilani", and it came back 67%, I texted "Vilimaina", and it came back 24%, and I texted Jodie, and it came back 87%. So that means that my dream partner is Jodie Low, and I wasted about 3 bucks. Sadly, I then texted the cheating line, and there was a 95% percent chance she was cheating on me. Damn fitness models, you can't trust them. It's an absolute and complete scam, but for some reason, I found the results really compelling and interesting - a bit like that game at school with the psychic predictions through numerals. Technically, isn't Jodie Low cheating on me? I wouldn't have this problem with Effie Michaels...

It did make me wonder though if anyone has actually broken up with someone based on this particular phone scam though. And it also made me think of other scams that have been on TV here in Australia. It was impossible in Tasmania a few years ago to avoid seeing the Mega Memory guy. They had a clip from the Danny Bonaduce chat show where the Mega Memory guy was the guest. It aired long after Dannys joke about the axing of the Chevy Chase show had stopped making sense. From memory, it involved the Mega Memory guy impressing Danny with his ability to remember a list of 30 items forwards and backwards. The reason I remember this was because (allegedly) he was busted for tax evasion and when they asked where the receipts for certain items were, he said he couldn't remember. Someone call Alanis. Closer to home, I remember this little Indian guy who used to be on all the time in Burnie doing the full Franco Cozzo/Ken Bruce shouty ad about the failure of his carpet business, how he couldn't feed his family and if people didn't buy a carpet at his closure sale at West Park, within the next week, he would probably be deported back to India in a crate. The trouble was, this ad was on every week for six years. Every week, closing down, big trouble, can't feed kids, carpets must go within a week, wolves at the door - I think in the end he sold so much carpet, someone told me he bought a yacht and a big house in Launceston.

The big scare campaign here in Australia about mobile phones doesn't have anything to do with scams- right now the big scare is about sexting, which is (so the kids say) when you send your boyfriend a naked picture of yourself and it ends up all over the Internet. Hell, that's not a scare, that crazy guy out of the AGE put his daughter naked on the cover of a magazine, that scared me a whole lot more. The amount of Tar going into the lungs of a pack a day smoker, that's scary. Now, I can imagine being a 16 year old and having your boyfriend show all his mates a naked picture of you, it will be very upsetting, but you'll learn a very valuable lesson - don't text a picture of yourself to Lance Franklin. That's just how he is.

Now, let me see if Ms Kai is cheating on me...

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